What if Hogwarts had MSN?
by schoolgirl-cheesesculpture
Summary: Well, this is what we think would happen. ....edit... Sorry it is taking so long to update! We will try to write another chap soon! Written by whitetyger123 and schoolgirlcheesesculpture.
1. Akward moments

The dreaded question: What if Hogwarts had msn?

Awkward moments

Well if they did, this is what we think would happen….. Be warned... you may find out some things you never wanted to know… about some people… like…..you'll have to read to find out!

Disclaimer: We do not own anything to do with Harry Potter, but only our imagination and creativity.

Please review! It took a lot of brain power to think like someone stupid. If you don't believe us, you try it being Crabbe and Goyle, not to mention other people…….. Have fun!

Scarface has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hi, is anybody there?

Scarface: I know your there somewhere….

Aracnophobic-Red-Head has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hi… Umm... who are you?

Scarface: Wait….Aracnophobic…..Red-head… rings a bell...

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: … who do think i am harry

Scarface: RON!

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: no… its the easter bunny…. of course its me you idiot.

Scarface: Yeah because all Easter Bunnies have red hair.

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: i was being sacra… saraco….ummm i was joking ok

Book-worm has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hi….. Someone that I don't know what there real name is.

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: honestly harry who else do you know that is always reading

Book-worm: Exactly.

Scarface: HERMIONE!

Book-worm: RON! What do you think you're doing?

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: sorry i was checking your tag to see if you were made in heav…

Book-worm: Don't you DARE finish that sentence……..

Scarface: Jeez Hermione… no need to get physical…

Book-worm: Ron, don't you dare say anything.

I-dated-two-champions……At-the-same-time has entered the chat room

Scarface: Uhhhhhhhh….-drool-

Book-worm: Uhh… wait, who dated… Who are you?

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: did it hurt when you fell from heaven

Book-worm: Ron, don't go there again……

Scarface: Really… who are you?

I-dated-two-champions……At-the-same-time: It's me… Cho

Scarface: But, but…. Cedric was dead when you went out with me… and believe me, I should remember.

I-dated-two-champions……At-the-same-time: Oh… umm, ill be back

I-dated-two-champions……At-the-same-time has left the chat room

Book-worm: She's evil, it's a wonder that she isn't in Slytherin…

Slytherin-hottie has entered the chat room

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: umm cho! hey hermione…. you were right! she really is in slytherin!

Slytherin-hottie: I'm Not Cho… I'm Draco.

Scarface: Malfoy…

Book-worm: Malfoy…

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: malfoy…

I-dated-three-champions……Two-at-the-same-time has entered the chat room

Bookworm: -sharp intake of breath-

Scarface: Umm, ok.. theres me… and cedric and … what comes after two? Oh right, three and that is….

I-dated-three-champions……Two-at-the-same-time: Give it up Hermione, he's not yours any more.

Scarface: I GET IT! Aww, Cho!

Slytherin-hottie: btw Potter… why is your name Scarface… I thought it was MY pet name for you

Scarface: Well, I thought that if I put my name as the boy who lived, no one would know who I was… and I'm widely known as scarface sooo…

Slytherin-hottie: Wow... it must have been quite the challenge for you to write two lines!

Scarface: Well, actually...

Book-worm: So Malfoy... Where are your two body guards?

Aracnophobic-Red-Head: yeah what are their names again… oh right jake and bob

Slytherin-hottie: Well, there right here, but if you want them to come on…

C has entered the chat room

G has entered the chat room

C: Hi

G: Hi

I-dated-three-champions……Two-at-the-same-time: Wow, how's that for an imagination.

Slytherin-hottie: Actually, it's quite an improvement.

Book-worm: Well as much as I LOVE to talk to everyone…and Malfoy, I have to finish that book I was reading… yeah that's it…

Book-worm has left the chat room

Aracnophobic-Red-Head': i better go…umm... finish that book too……..OW HERMIONE! gotta go …. hermione's going to kill me……OWW ..OUCH! HEY THAT HURT!

Aracnophobic-Red-Head has left the chat room

C: ugggg

G: ugggg

C has left the chat room

G has left the chat room

Slytherin-hottie: Uh you idiots! That's not how you turn off a computer! I have to go.

Slytherin-hottie has left the chat room

Scarface: Umm, who's here still….

I-dated-three-champions……Two-at-the-same-time: Just me…

Scarface: Oh…. This is awkward…ummm … I have to go… eat…..some pie! Yeah that's it…. I like pie……its good….for you… and little happy bunnies…..and rainbows….and btw have you tasted the rainbow?

I-dated-three-champions……Two-at-the-same-time: Umm…. You should just go…

Scarface: Yeah ill go to my happy place… with pie…. And bunnies …. And a rainbow…

I-dated-three-champions……Two-at-the-same-time: Umm right.

I-dated-three-champions……Two-at-the-same-time: You've been spending too much time with Prof. Trelawney….

I-dated-three-champions……Two-at-the-same-time has left the chat room

Scarface: Uhh bye… I guess I'm alllllll aloooooooone. Too bad for her, she can't taste MY rainbow.

Scarface has left the chat room.

Toad.on.the.road has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Hi who ever's here…

Toad.on.the.road: Is anyone here?

Toad.on.the.road: Or am I just talking to myself?

Toad.on.the.road: Man, I'm such a loser….

Toad.on.the.road has left the chat room


	2. Poor Toadontheroad

Poor Toad.on.the.road

Disclaimer: Of course you know what I'm going to say again, so I won't say it.

Umm ok, this is our second one tonight and we are a teeny bit hyper, and this msn thingy is our first fan fiction so don't be too hard on us.( yes I said us, two people share this account, its not an imaginary friend, wait I got to go and ask my mom if its true, MOM!) Lol ,jk. So enjoy the ride, or show, or presentation or what ever you'd like to call this! Once again ….Have fun!

Cat in the hat has entered the chat room

Cat in the hat: In my day they never had technology like this…..

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has entered the chat room

Cat in the hat: Hello boys.

Scarface: Who are you?

Scarface: Oh wait. You're McGonagall.

Cat in the hat: Professor McGonagall to you Mr. Potter.

Scarface: Hey, how'd you know it was me?

Cat in the hat: Lucky guess.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: how did you know it was McGonagall

Scarface: I could hear the strictness of her typing.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: uhh… harry you cant here her…. were typing….

Scarface: So….

Cat in the hat: So boys… How much homework have you done yet?

Scarface: Umm, I gotta go.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: me too

Scarface has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has left the chat room

Cat in the hat: Well, there's nothing for me to do here.

Cat in the hat: I thought that this… MSN would be more exciting the amount the students talk about it.

Cat in the hat has left the chat room

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: has entered the chat room

Book-worm has entered the chat room

Scarface: I thought she would never leave.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: she was only on for two more seconds then we were

Scarface: So?

Book-worm: Who was on?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: no one you would know…..

Scarface: Psss Ron… Make a new messaging board with me...

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: uhh ok

----PRIVATE CONVERSTION BETWEEN HARRY AND RON----

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: yeah what

Scarface: Let's bug Hermione!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: how

Scarface: By spelling everything wrong and not using punctuation!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: but I never use it

Scarface: Exactly.

----BACK TO THE MAIN CONVERSATION----

Book-worm: I'm just singing in the rain…. Just singing in the rain!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: wat ar you duing

Book-worm: Umm… Nothing… Ron, I can hardly read what you are writing. Please use the correct spelling.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: So harie wut U duin tudai

Book-worm: Ronald! Seriously!

Scarface: wel eye wuz thincin of ryden me broomm arawnd the skoole

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: kewl

Book-worm: ARRRGGHH! You guys are driving me up the wall!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: i was wondering how long it was going to be until she cracked

Scarface: Lol

Book-worm: Where did you learn that Harry?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: what does it mean

Scarface: Internet.

Book-worm: Ahh lol.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: what does it mean!

Book-worm: laugh out loud

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: ah… lol

I-love-hermioninny has entered the chat room

I-love-hermioninny: hello hermioninny

Book-worm: Victor, what are you doing here?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: you had your fun with her, now I have dibs… See Hermione, I used caps lock.

Book-worm: Umm, Ron, I don't know whether to be flattered or disgusted.

I-love-hermioninny: I have been craving to hear your voice… Uh…. See you type for a long time, my love

Book-worm: Awwww, that's so sweet.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: grrrrrrrrr

Scarface: Jealous Ron?

Black-raven has entered the chat room

Scarface: Who are you?

Black-raven: it's me Cho.

Scarface: That wasn't what your name was yesterday… now, what was it again… something to do with dating…. Umm... Me and Cedric and…Fleur! No... That can't be right…who else was a champion…

Black-raven: What are you talking about…I didn't do anything like that...

Black-raven has left the chat room

I-love-hermioninny: Farewell my love, next time I hope I speak to you in person

I-love-hermioninny has left the chat room

It's-all-about-me has entered the chat room

It's-all-about-me: Hello Harry.

Scarface: Uhh.. Hi… I thought your name yesterday was Slytherinhottie?

It's-all-about-me: Id like to let you know that I am in Beauxbatons, not Hogwarts, and I have never had my name as something as disgusting as that!

Slytherin-hottie has entered the chat room

Slytherin-hottie: Someone say my name?

Scarface: AHHH! He can read minds!

Slytherin-hottie: just asking….

It's-all-about-me: Harry was just saying he thought that you were me.

Slytherin-hottie: Hmm… nice name anyway.

It's-all-about-me: Thank you.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: -drool- Fleur…..

It's-all-abou-tme: Yes Ron?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: uhh… nothing…

Scarface: Hey Hermione… You haven't said anything in a while. What are you doing?

Book-worm: More important things.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: like what

Book-worm: One word. Reading.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: oh

Slytherin-hottie: I'm sorry to interrupt your bleak and meaningless lives but I have to go.

Slytherin-hottie has left the chat room

It's-all-about-me: I must be going as well. I left the circus elephants in the car and didn't crack a window.

It's-all-about-me has left the chat room

Book-worm: Hmm… wouldn't it be impossible to fit elephants into a car?

Book-worm: Well, I'm at a really interesting part of my book, I must go and finish it.

Book-worm has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: wow she takes her name too seriously

Cat in the hat has entered the chat room

Scarface: Uhhhh…

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: uhhhh….

Cat in the hat: Did you finish your homework?

Scarface has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: has left the chat room

Cat in the hat: I best be keeping an eye on those two.

Cat in the hat has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Ok, if anyone's not there, tell me right now.

Toad.on.the.road: …

Toad.on.the.road: I'm talking to myself again aren't I?

Toad.on.the.road: Ok… I'm going know…. If anyone's there say so right know…. Riighhhtt now…. Now…. Ok I'm leaving…seriously ……I'm turning off the computer right now……..awww….

Toad.on.the.road: I'm a loser.

Toad.on.the.road has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Really! I'm going to leave!

Toad.on.the.road: Stop it! Stop being such an idiot! No wonder you could only get a third year to come to the ball with you…..

Toad.on.the.road has left the chat room


	3. Dead and Inanimate Objects

Dead and Inanimate Objects

Disclaimer: Ok….. Here we go again. We do not, I repeat not own anything that J.K. Rowling has created, just what they do, and say,and type and think and, well you get the hint.

Another conversation brought to you by schoolgirl-cheesesculpture , and that amazingly doesn't include Harry! But, it does include some other characters that we previously have known…….. And random and not so random items from the books and lucky Toad.on.the.road .Ideas are always welcome. Have fun! (It's our catch phrase).

Toad.on.the.road has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Ok… I know no one is here, so I'm just going to leave right now.

Pleaseplaypokerwithapoltergeist has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Yes! A person to talk to!

Pleaseplaypokerwithapoltergeist: Ello lckle Nevillkins.

Toad.on.the.road: Peeves, I wouldn't even be talking to you right know, but you were mean to Umbridge so I forgive you, and plus you are the only person… or ghost… that I have been able to talk to on here.tear

Pleaseplaypokerwithapoltergeist: Filch will soon be blaming you for breaking a computer.

Pleaseplaypokerwithapoltergeist has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Uh oh.

Mad-hatter has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Uh… who wears a hat…

Mad-hatter: Not who wears a hat, who IS a hat.

Toad.on.the.road: Oh man! First I was talking to a poltergeist and now a talking… well typing hat? I must be going crazy.

Mad-hatter: Too late, why else do you think I put you in Gryffindor.

Dead, but still living the life has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Nearly Headless Nick? Is that you?

Dead, but still living the life: No, I'm not nearly headless, and I'm not nick either.

Toad.on.the.road: Then what are you. Nothing would surprise me now.

Dead, but still living the life: I'm Sirius.

Toad.on.the.road: Ok... But, who are you?

Dead, but still living the life: I'm Sirius.

Toad.on.the.road: I get that you're serious, but seriously, who are you?

Dead, but still living the life: I'm Black, Sirius Black, the one guy you tried to save in your fifth year….

Toad.on.the.road: OHHHHHHHH… but, your not even a ghost, how are you on a computer?

Dead, but still living the life: Well, they have surprisingly good reception behind this curtain….

Toad.on.the.road: …

Mad-hatter: I best be on my way, I have to go think about what order the first years are going to be in.

Mad-hatter has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: I wonder what he meant by that…

Dead, but still living the life: You don't actually think he really thought that you were Gryffindor material, do you?

Toad.on.the.road: Oh, I never thought about it that way…

Cheeselovertillthedeath….andafter has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Umm… cheese?

Toad.on.the.road: Wait, don't say it, you're another dead person aren't you?

Cheeselovertillthedeath….andafter: Ok then, I won't tell you.

Toad.on.the.road: Twitch

Dead, but still living the life: Really, it's not that bad. You can come join us if you like…

Cheeselovertillthedeath….andafter: We have Cheese!

Toad.on.the.road: No, I think I'm alright, I like my life just fine thanks, and I have enough cheese to last me awhile.

Cheeselovertillthedeath….andafter: Cheese.

Toad.on.the.road: Ok, really, so who are you, cheese lover?

Cheeselovertillthedeath….andafter: I'm just a lonely ghost who likes cheese, too bad I cant like I as much as I did before I got my head nearly chopped off……..oh darn, I gave it away.

Toad.on.the.road: Oh, hi Nick, I never knew you had such a passion for cheese.

Cheeselovertillthedeath….andafter: Well, that's the reason why I got my head nearly chopped off.

Toad.on.the.road: Oh, it was over cheese?

Cheeselovertillthedeath….andafter: Not just any cheese, the Queen's cow's cheese, anyways I got to go.

Dead, but still living the life: Ok then.

Cheeselovertillthedeath….andafter has left the chat room

Diary101 has entered the chat room -disappear-

(A/N the reason it does this is because it is Tom Riddles diary, and as you know, whatever is put into it, disappears)

Toad.on.the.road; Let me guess, another random thing and/or object huh, but, why did it disappear?

Diary101: because I am magic. -disappear-

Dead, but still living the life: That makes it a whole bunch clearer.

Diary101: I'm Tom Riddle's diary, duh. -disappear-

Toad.on.the.road: Yeah, but I still don't know who you are.

Diary101: Just forget about it.-disappear-

Dead, but still living the life: Ok, then by the way, how do you type?

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: DON'T SAY THAT WORD!

Diary101: What word? -disappear-

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: Oh, you know the word……

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Ok, but what is the word?

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: You know you know the word…

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

Dead, but still living the life: Umm right, I wish we did know the word so this random… thing… will leave us alone.

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: But I know that you know, that I know that you know ,that I know you know the word. So there.

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

Diary101: Interesting. So, how's your day? -disappear-

Toad.on.the.road: Good, well, as good as a day can be when your talking to dead and/or inanimate objects can be.

Dead, but still living the life: Are you saying that you don't like to talk to us? The offer is still on if you want to join us.

Toad.on.the.road: No it's just … Uhhh… awkward……

Diary101: Sorry but I have to leave, I just realized that I don't exist anymore…-disappear for good-

Diary101 has left the chat room -disappear-

Ageiswisdom,sogetoverit has entered the chat room

Dead, but still living the life: Hermione? Is that you? But what about the age part….. are you saying your old?

Toad.on.the.road: YES! Finally a real LIVE person to talk to.

Ageiswisdom,sogetoverit: Sorry to ruin your festivities, but I'm not among the living anymore, as you might say.

Dead, but still living the life: Dumbledore? Is that you? Sorry for thinking that you were Hermione. So, how is the afterlife treating you?

Ageiswisdom,sogetoverit: Good, good. And Neville how's the realm of the living?

Toad.on.th.road: Uhh, as good as it ever was I guess….

Dead, but still living the life: Good bye, me and Prongs wanted to go and torment Wormtail…….

Dead, but still living the life has left the chat room

Ageiswisdom,sogetoverit: Same here for me, I must go to my meeting with Flammel.

Ageiswisdom,sogetoverit has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Ok, so am I all alone again…..

Toad.on.the.road: Oh, Flich I swear, I didn't do it…..NO! NOOOOOO! OUCH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Toad.on.the.road has left the chat room

Heart-of-the-brave has entered the chat room

HiSs has entered the chat room

Heart-of-the-brave: I'm not talking to you, Salazar.

HiSs: Why not Godric?

Heart-of-the-brave: Because you call me names.

HiSs: No I don't.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes you do.

HiSs: No.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes.

HiSs: No.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes.

HiSs: No.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes.

HiSs: No.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes.

HiSs: No.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes.

HiSs: I do not you goodie-two-shoes!

Heart-of-the-brave: HA! You did it just now!

HiSs: No I didn't.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes you did.

HiSs: No.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes

HiSs: No.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes

HiSs: No.

Heart-of-the-brave: Yes

HiSs: Yes.

Heart-of-the-brave: No.

HiSs: Ha! You said no!

Heart-of-the-brave: No fair! You cheated!

HiSs: I'm not talking to you anymore

Heart-of-the-brave: Well I'm not talking to YOU any more.

HiSs: Fine.

Heart-of-the-brave: FINE!

HiSs has left the chat room

Heart-of-the-brave has left the chat room

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! We love this! It's so funny that all Neville was able to talk to was dead and/or inanimate objects. It's also funny how we made the big, powerful and imposing founders of the school houses act like little children! Read the next one and don't forget to review!


	4. Death Eater Tea Party

Death Eater Tea Party

Disclaimer: You know what I know so you know what I know I'm going to say so lets just not say it.

More random fiddles of Harry Potter nonsense even thought he had no sense to begin with. Just to let you know, since it is over msn they can't really have tea…together… so grab a cup'a tea and ….. (Here it comes) HAVE FUN!

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed has entered the chat room

Book-worm has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hey everyone, do you want to go to a different chat room that I found yesterday?

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: i guess… anyways, this ones getting boring

Book-worm: Ok, what's the chat room called?

Scarface: Death Eaters secret chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: cool

Book-worm: Sounds suspicions……. Oh well.

----DEATH EATER SECRET CHAT ROOM----

Good….or evil: So, our grand master plan is going to happen on this Monday.

Wormtail: And it's at white spot…. Right, Lucius?

Good…or evil: …. Yes, it is.

Wormtail: The one downtown or the one on Eastwood Rd?

Good…or evil:…Eastwood.

Wormtail: Ok… Can I bring a friend?

Good…or evil: Who is it?

Wormtail: You may not know him…. But his name is Draco.

Good…or evil: Oh, you can bring him, but make sure he minds his manners at the dinner table.

Scarface has entered the secret chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed has entered the secret chat room

Book-worm has entered the secret chat room

Wormtail: Ummm, who are you? Has Voldy chosen some new death eaters? Or have you just changed your screen name?

Good…or evil: You idiot! You gave away the fact that we're Death Eaters way to easily.

Scarface: Your death eaters?

Wormtail: No………….

Good…or evil: …

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: wow this place is much more exciting then the hogwarts chat room

Scarface: Well, since your not Death Eaters, I'm Harry, and the other peoples are Ron and Hermione

Book-worm: Uh, Harry … I think that they ARE Death Eaters…

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed; how could they….. they even said them selves that they weren't

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies! has entered the secret chat room

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: How are my D.D.E.D.

Scarface: What's that mean?

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: Dark Death Eating Dominions

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: cool

Book-worm: Who are you, dark side?

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: I am VOLDEMORT! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Scarface: Hi, I'm Harry Potter.

Scarface: Hey! Weren't you on that horror movie….. With all that horror…..and the words at the end?

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: Ohhh.! I saw that movie! Nope, I'm not in it. I'm trying to take over the world. Hence my name.

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: what kind of cookies are they

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: Duh! Chocolate chip! What other kind is there?

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: good point

Good…or evil? has left the secret chat room

Wormtail: That was sudden.

Wormtail has left the secret chat room

Book-worm: Wow, deja vue

Scarface:…

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the secret chat room

Trees,are,frienldy,don't,bite,the,bark: DON'T SAY THE WORD!

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: he didnt say anything it was just …

Trees,are,frienldy,don't,bite,the,bark: Oh, sorry, wrong secret chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the secret chat room

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: What was that all about?

Book-worm: Nothing, just a stalker.

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: Your's?

Scarface: No, it's all of ours.

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: Oh. Ok.

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: if I go to the dark side will you give me cookies right away…. or do i have to wait awhile

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: What! You're not on the dark side already? That's it, your outta here! But, before I violently kick you out, how did you find this site?

Scarface: Google

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies: Ill be right back

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies! has left the secret chat room

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies has entered the secret chat room

Come to the dark side…..we have cookies! has kicked out Scarface, Aracniphobic-Red-Hed and Book-worm from the secret chat room

----BACK IN THE HOGWARTS CHAT ROOM----

Scarface: Aww man that sucks that Voldy kicked us out…. Ron, why did you say that?

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: say what

Scarface: What you said.

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: oh right sorry

Scarface: Its ok, it was stupid anyways. Whoever's idea that was should never have an idea again!

Book-worm: Harry, it was your idea.

Scarface: Oh, never mind…. Wait! I had an idea! Wow, big improvement……

Book-worm: Umm right Harry.

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: it takes too long to type lets go hang out in the common room.

Book-worm: Ron, we're in the common room

Scarface: So? Sounds good.

Book-worm: Fine.

Scarface has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed has left the chat room

Book-worm has left the chat room

----BACK TO DEATH EATER SECRET CHAT ROOM----

Torturedbysomelovedbymany : So, do you think that they'll have milk at the party?

Wormtail: Why do you like milk so much?

Torturedbysomelovedbymany: Because its white……

Wormtail: Then do you like…OWWW! What was that?

Torturedbysomelovedbymany: and tasty, and good……for you…… and …and

Wormtail: I didn't know I put the bookself there….AHHHH! THE BOOKS ARE ATTACKING ME!

Torturedbysomelovedbymany: And comes from cows……and goats……and ……and…

Wormtail: Avery, can you help me. THIS ISNT A WHEELY CHAIR! YOU SHOULDENT MOVE!

Torturedbysomelovedbymany: breaks from ranting about milk goes into ranting about wheely chairs I like Wheely chairs , there fun, once…. When I was little… I went on one…… and I fell… and broke my face…….. good times… gooooooood times………

Wormtail: Im serious... OWWW come ……OUCH! ….. Help! AHHH! GET BACK HERE! I NEED THAT! Voldys gonna kiiiiiiiiiill me.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(A/N if you haven't read the other ones in our series you have to read dead and inanimate objects to get the joke here and to understand the golden trio's stalker. Also read the other ones cause there funny!)


	5. Getting in Touch With Your Muggle Side

Getting in Touch With Your Muggle Side

Disclaimer: You know what this means….. Don't you?

Okie dokie then! Hail the randomness of msn! I must be going crazy….I'm talking to the computer…..again. Umm, wait, is that a muggle site that their on? Before you go and check it out, don't forget…... (Brace yourselves)……. HAVE FUN!

My.imaginary.friend.thinks.you.have.mental.issues: So, how is the padded sell?

Idon'tspeedthesignsarewrong: Umm, it's white, and…….padded….how's yours?

My.imaginary.friend.thinks.you.have.mental.issues: Well, really, it's a wonder that their letting me on a computer…..

Idon'tspeedthesignsarewrong: …… Ok……

Pieisgood: Hey! Me too! What mental institution are you from?

My.imaginary.friend.thinks.you.have.mental.issues: Uh…. I was just joking…

Pieisgood: Uh…. Right ….. Me too -cough cough-

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hey! This is cool! It's so much better then the one at Hogwarts or that Death Eater one.

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: so true

I+know+im+not+a+famous+rock+star+but+i+like+to+think+i+am: Hogwarts? Death Eaters?

Idon'tspeedthesignsarewrong: You guys are crazy.

Idon'tspeedthesignsarewrong has left the chat room

Pieisgood: I like to call it mentally challenged.

My.imaginary.friend.thinks.you.have.mental.issues: Umm, ok then…..Ill just be going……. Now…..

My.imaginary.friend.thinks.you.have.mental.issues has left the chat room

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: What's an ………emu?

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: IT'S NOT EMU! IT'S EMO! -cries-

I+know+im+not+a+famous+rock+star+but+i+like+to+think+i+am: Nice going Red-Head, she's probably going to cut herself now…….

Aracniphobic-Red-Hed: oh…. im sorry emo…… hey, do you want to go on a private chat with me?

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: Well, I don't normally talk to people…. But I guess I can make and exception…

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it has gone to a private chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has gone to a private chat room

Scarface: Hey pie……. I like pie too…..

Pieisgood: Wow, its like…..fate……do you wanna go on a private chat and talk about it?

Scarface: Ok!

Bookworm has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hey Hermione! What are you doing on this chat room? I thought that you would be on the one about Potions class….

Bookworm: HARRY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE! THIS IS A MUGGLE WEB SITE!

I+know+im+not+a+famous+rock+star+but+i+like+to+think+i+am: Muggle? You're strange…….. You should go with the pie dudes…….

I+know+im+not+a+famous+rock+star+but+i+like+to+think+i+am has left the chat room

Scarface: Oh, woops…..

Bookworm: Yeah, big woops.

Booksrule has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hey look Hermione! It's your doppelganger!

Booksrule: Hey bookworm, do you want to go and talk about……books?

Bookworm: OK!

Booksrule has gone to a private chat room

Bookworm has gone to a private chat room

Scarface: Ok, were was I …….

Pieisgood: Do you want to go talk about pie now?

Scarface: Right…. ok sounds good!...Like pie!

Pieisgood has gone to a private chat room

Scarface has gone to a private chat room

----RON'S AND EMO'S PRIVATE CHAT ROOM----

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: soo whats an emo anyways

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: Were a large group of depressed, and usually suicidal people.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: well if your usually suicidal…… wouldn't it be a small group

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: We're not that suicidal and even if we are, we usually fail at that too.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: oh….. that's sad…….i don't like spiders……

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: Spiders are my only true friends in this deep, dark, depressing world

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: wow……thats deep…..

----HERMOINE'S AND BOOK'S CHAT ROOM----

Booksrule: What do you like about books?

Bookworm: Oh, I like all the information you can get from them.

Bookworm: What do you like about them?

Booksrule: I like the smell of a new book…… and the sound of the pages turning…..and the feel of the leather cover with gold lettering………

Bookworm: Oh, so…..so ……. You like reading them too right?

Booksrule: I don't have any books with actual words in them…… just pictures…… of pretty ponies…..

Bookworm: …

Booksrule: Whats wrong?

Bookworm: Nothing…..

----HARRY'S AND PIE'S CHAT ROOM----

Scarface: So, I see you like pie.

Pieisgood: Do you think you're a wizard? I …sometimes imagine…….that I am……a dragon! But that's just a game…..really…. I'm an elf!

Scarface: Oh, you're lucky, I've never seen an elf in real life, but I HAVE seen many pictures of them.

Pieisgood: I've seen pictures of wizards too, but I've also seen a REAL one.

Scarface: Oh, who's that?

Pieisgood: Gilbert

Scarface: Oh…….You like pie?

Pieisgood: Yes, sometimes they give pie to us in this place……….but Gilbert tells me not to eat it, because they have poisoned it.

Scarface: Who are they?

Pieisgood: The scary people……their watching me…..right now….

Scarface: Uhh…. Right… I like pie too…..and bunnies….. and….did you know that in my happy place, there's a rainbow? You should taste it some time.

----RON'S AND EMO'S CHAT ROOM----

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: And then……then, he told me he didn't really love me……

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: aww……its ok….. im sure he really does love you….

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: No, he doesn't…..

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: how do you know

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: Because the next day he started dating my sister……

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: wow that would be like….lav-lav dating fred…….or george………or percy….or charlie…..or bill……

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: Wow, you have a big family.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: i also have my mom dad and younger sister…..and that's not the worst part……my best friend started dating my sister……. and I want to date my best friend…..

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: Are you….. gay?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: no…..one of my best friends a girl, and ones a guy…..

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it: Oh…..too bad.

Im/emo/and/there's/nothing/you/can/do/about/it has left the private chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has left the private chat room

----HERMIONE'S AND BOOK'S CHAT ROOM----

Bookworm: Wow, I never knew there was such depth to picture books……

Booksrule: Yes, I know, I was amazed when I first started a year ago.

Bookworm: Oh, how old were you?

Booksrule: Well, when you're as old as I am, you start to lose track of how old you are……but I think I was around five…..and a half

Bookworm: WHAT! You're only six?

Booksrule: And a half!

Bookworm: Never mind……..

Booksrule has left the private chat room

Bookworm has left the private chat room

----HARRY'S AND PIE'S CHAT ROOM----

Pieisgood: Wow, that rainbow WAS good.

Scarface: I told you……

Pieisgood: But you know…. We can't really taste it….. We're on the internet….

Scarface: Why not?

Pieisgood: Are you insane?

Pieisgood has left the private chat room

Scarface: Fine, be that way….. You're never going to taste MY rainbow again……

Scarface has left the private chat room

----HOGWARTS CHAT ROOM----

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: wow… i never knew that muggles were so depressing…..

Bookworm: ….And that picture books had such depth…..

Scarface: …..I say that their all insane……

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has left the chat room

Bookworm has left the chat room

Scarface has left the chat room

Pieisgood has entered the chat room

Pieisgood: Nooooo! Pie, you have betrayed me! I will never speak to you again! Gilbert was right!

Pieisgood: Ice cream…… is that you?

Pieisgood has left the chat room

Gilbert has entered the chat room

Gilbert: Has anyone seen a person under the name Pieisgood?

Gilbert: No, ok….. If you do tell him Gilbert says to come home.

Gilbert has left the chat room


	6. Fred and George and MaryKate and Ashely?

Fred and George and…..Mary-Kate and Ashley?

Disclaimer: Ummm…. Do I really have to repeat myself?Ok, i got like...over 800 hits and only 13 reviews...Is it realy hard to press the little purple button and say good job? Or if you feel nice something more.That would make our day(or burn if you flame us, its ok i guess, construtive criticism is good for you!)

Duh Duh! I know I know…… we haven't included Fred and/or George (and Ginny if you care about her) so we made this story to make up for it, with just them……ok, maybe not JUST them……. Well anyways enjoy and (Not again!)

HAVE FUN!

And they thought we just liked explosions: hi Fred

Pranksters gone wild: hi George

And they thought we just liked explosions: hi George

Pranksters gone wild: hi Fred

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar has entered the chat room

And they thought we just liked explosions: wow….. who has a temper

Pranksters gone wild: Ginny….who else

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Hi George, hi Fred….. Or is it hi Fred, hi George?

And they thought we just liked explosions: either way makes us proud……

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Haha, very funny.

Pranksters gone wild: i thought it was funny… didn't you Fred

Prankster gone wild: yes George … it was

And they thought we just liked explosions: but George... Ginny doesnt really have a sense of humor….

And they thought we just liked explosions: yes…. you do have a point there Fred

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: First, I do have a sense of humor and second…… who's who? Do you even know which is which?

Pranksters gone wild: we know very well whos who……im Mary-Kate and hes Ashley

Pranksters gone wild: no George….. i want to be Mary-Kate!

And they thought we just liked explosions: but you were Mary-Kate last time Fred

And they thought we just liked explosions: so….. i was born first so i get to pick

Pranksters gone wild: no i was

Pranksters gone wild: no……..it was me……by 2 minutes and 33 seconds

And they thought we just liked explosions: no it was me by 2 minutes and 34 seconds

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: I am surrounded by idiots

And they thought we just liked explosions: why….. is Ron there

Pranksters gone wild: or is it Harry……

And they thought we just liked explosions: you would like that…… wouldent you

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: What do you mean?

Pranksters gone wild: you know what we mean…..weve read your diary…..

Pranksters gone wild: …..a couple of times……

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: YOU DID WHAT?

And they thought we just liked explosions: a diary without a lock is and invitation to two nosy brothers

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: But I do have a lock……

Pranksters gone wild: ….and a diary WITH a lock is like a big sign saying "Read me!"

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: When I get my hands on you……

And they thought we just liked explosions: ohhhh…..better start running to mum Forge….

And they thought we just liked explosions: and you too Gred…..

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Hey, this random person just gave me a box of candy….the card says it's from my secret admirer.

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Hmm… There good…

And they thought we just liked explosions: snicker snicker

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: What's wrong?

Pranksters gone wild: oh this kid just turned into a canary……

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: You didn't just say the word…. Did you?

And they thought we just liked explosions: i don't think so…….

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: Are you sure?

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Well…..What is the word?

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: I DON'T KNOW!crying

Pranksters gone wild: well… did you used to know

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: I think so….

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: I'M SO PATHETIC!

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Well, that was interesting……

Itsthemarriedlifeforme has entered the chat room

And they thought we just liked explosions: look…….its another human bean

Pranksters gone wild: uh Ginny…….you better look in a mirror…….

Pranksters gone wild: ditto

Pranksters gone wild has left the chat room

And they thought we just liked explosions has left the chat room

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: Ummmmm…. Already then……..

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: I don't know what that was about….IM GOING TO KILL THOSE TWO!

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: What happen?

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Nothing…. Except that my nose is upside down…… they must have made a new candy…..

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: Uh…. By the way…. Who are you?

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Oh, I'm Ginny Weasley

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: Ohh……..It's you!

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Uh, last time I checked I was me………

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: No, it's me……Bill!

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: OHHHH! Hi!

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: Hi to you too………so….. how's your life?

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Good, I guess…. Other then the unfortunate side-affect of my nose being upside down….

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: But anyways…… How's it being married to Fle……Fleu………Fleeuurrrr (yes! I said it)

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: It's amazing! I love it…… its so invigoration being married to someone like Fleur…..

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: gag

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: What's that supposed to mean? She's kinda like your sister in-law.

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Oh yeah, I forgot…..NOOO!

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: OW……OW! OWWWWWWWWWW

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: What?

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: I got my ponytail stuck in my earring again………

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Oh…. just that.

Itsthemarriedlifeforme: Ok, I have to go…. And remember, don't go outside now when it is raining or else you'll drown.

Itsthemarriedlifeforme has left the chat room

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: What's that supposed to mean?

I have a twin named George has entered the chat room

I have a twin named Fred has entered the chat room

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: IM GONG TO KILL YOU TWO!WERE ARE YOU?

I have a twin named George: somewhere were you can't find us…….

I have a twin named Fred: neener neener neener!

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: When I get my hands on you two…………..

I have a twin named George: youll do what…..

I have a twin named Fred: really….. I don't know why people just leave it like that…….

I have a twin named George: … is it because they don't have an imagination….

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: You disgust me.

I have a twin named Fred: Which one… Mary-Kate …..

I have a twin named George:…..or Ashely…..oh right…. im Mary-Kate

I have a twin named Fred: nuh huh

I have a twin named George: uh huh

I have a twin named Fred: nuh huh

I have a twin named George: uh huh

I have a twin named Fred: nuh huh

I have a twin named George: uh huh

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: STOP! Stop when I still have my sanity!

I have a twin named Fred: if you had sanity… you would have already moved out...

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Good point…..

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: Wait for a second…. Im just going to go and talk to mum…..

I have a twin named George: uh oh…we better be going….

I have a twin named Fred: right at you…and plus… theres a new bunch of first years that need welcoming……

I have a twin named George: oh… by the way… your NOSE isn't upside down anymore………

I have a twin named Fred has left the chat room

I have a twin named George has left the chat room

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: What do they mean by…………..AHHHHHHHH!

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar has left the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: I know whos fault it is for not knowing the word!

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: It's Santa Clause!

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room


	7. Contract Lenses

Contract Lenses

Disclaimer: Ok, seriously (lol Sirius…) if I did own Harry Potter I wouldent be writing this, I would be finishing up Harry Potter 7 (which is coming out 07/07/07)

This is the best! Ok, just to let you know, this is not the work of the people the use this account. This story is made and thought up by KL, and is also copyrighted to her( we wish) and if you want to use our ideas, please ask, we can be very forgiving. Ok, so bundle up and get ready for a wild ride and ….HAVE FUN!

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has entered the chat room

Book-worm has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hey Hermione where are you?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: yeah….. i dont see you anywhere in the common room

Book-worm: Where do you think I am?

Scarface: In Candyland?

Book-worm: ………No……..

Scarface: Then you must be in the library reading... again.

Book-worm: Your right, I am at the library, but I'm not reading.

Scarface: Then what are you doing?

Book-worm: Why would I be reading when I'm talking to you two idiots…..

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: because you love me…..

Book-worm: …

Scarface: But still, you're usually reading even when you are on.

Book-worm: FYI, I'm doing my homework. Would you like to come join me? Professor McGonagall told me that you haven't been doing your homework.

Scarface: No…..I think were fine….But, what does FYI mean?

Book-worm: For you information.

Book-worm: …ok then Ron, do you want to?

Scarface: Do what?

Book-worm: ARGH! Omg! Do you want to do your homework with me!

Scarface: Uhh… What does omg mean?

Book-worm: oh my gosh.

Scarface: What happened?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: did you die and then fall from heaven

Book-worm: RONALD! How many times have I told you not to say that!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: once….. (cheesy grin)

Book-worm: Anyways! Do you two want to come to the library and do your homework with me?

Scarface: No…..Hey! How about you come to the common room?

Book-worm: It's too noisy and there are too many people in there.

Scarface: Actually, there's almost no one here.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: whats astigmatism

Book-worm: A what?

Scarface: Where did that come from?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: A box…..

Book-worm: I know what it is!

Scarface: How do you know…..Oh wait…Stupid question……..Of course you know because you are Hermoine…. Or are you…

Book-worm: It has something to do with eyes. Where did you get the box from Ron?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: fred and george gave it to me…..they said it was ground dragon claws

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: Don't say the word!

Scarface: What's the word?

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: You know the word……

Book-worm: Do you even know the word?

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: Ummm……Uh….. Uh…. SHUT UP! –Starts sobbinguncontroably -

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

Scarface: Stalker!

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: HA! You said it!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: said what

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: The word.

Scarface: Is stalker the word?

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: NO!

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: hermione, what are contract lenses

Book-worm: No you idiot! Contact lenses! They help your sight.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: hey harry….. you should try them

Scarface: Ok.

Scarface has left the chat room

Book-worm: So…..It's just you and me now. What to sing "Kum bah yah"?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: sure…..but first answer my question….and dont get mad……did it hurt when you fell from heaven

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: hiya harry

Scarface: her,onid ne binr

Book-worm: What?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: he said hermione im blind

Book-worm: What?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: He said…

Book-worm: I know what he said!

Scarface: contavt kences sucj

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: he said contract lenses suck

Book-worm: There called con_tact_ lenses.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: thats what i lenses

Book-worm: No.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: yes

Book-worm: Whatever!

Book-worm: Harry, how did you put them on?

Scarface: k sowkki taoed tghen tin nu gkasses

Book-worm: Oh, that's not how you do it!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: hey! you understood what he said

Book-worm: So?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: you never understood before

Book-worm: It was just one time, and I knew what he said anyways.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: yeah well……well

Book-worom: Oh be quiet. Anyways, you don't put them on your glasses Harry; you put them on your eyes

Scarface: Ohh, ok.

Scarface has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: so im going to ask you once more….

Book-worm: La la la I cant here you…

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: fine then……. Hey wait... you cant hear me anyways because were typing

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: Don't say it!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: it!

Book-worm: Don't say what, the word?

Book-worm: Hey! That means you figured out what the word is! What is it?

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: Ok, the word is….

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

Book-worm: Well, we may never know the word.

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: how are they harry

Scarface: hrw ate wdat?

Book-worm: Well, he's still spelling everything wrond so there not good.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: the contracts of course! right……

Book-worm: Ron, for the last time there contact! I don't even know where you got contracts from.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: thats what i said

Book-worm: No you didn't, otherwise I wouldn't be telling you you're wrong.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: yes i did

Book-worm: Nope.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: yes i did……..

Book-worm: Just shut up…. What did Harry say anyways?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: he said how are what

Scarface: There horrivle. Me blihf.

Book-worm: Well, what did he say?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: their horrible im blind

Book-worm: Well, what did you do this time Harry?

Scarface: eye sello tsped thsm to my eyds.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: he said….

Book-worm: I know what he said Ron…

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: how…

Book-worm: I just did. Now drop it. Harry, did you take them out of the package?

Scarface: Ni.

Book-worm: That explans a lot…… take them off, I'll be right there.

Book-worm has left the chat room

Scarface has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: im all alone….. theres no one here beside me….

Cat in the hat has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: na na na na….na na na na….hey hey hey…..good bye

Cat in the hat: Ah, Mr. Weasly, have you finally done you homework?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: uhh…….

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has left the chat room

Cat in the hat: I'll take that as a no.

Cat in the hat has left the chat room

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has entered the chat room

Scarface: Ouch!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: what

Scarface: Never mind it worked.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: how did you do it

Scarface: I took them out of the package and spello taped them to my eyes but then I blinked.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: then what

Scarface: I took the tape out of my eye and I could see.

C has entered the chat room

G has entered the chat room

C: ugg

G: ugg

C: malfoy

Scarface: He's not here.

Book-worm has entered the chat room

Slytherin-hottie has entered the chat room

Book-worm: So, did it work Harry?

Scarface: Yeah!

G: malfoy

Slytherin-hottie: Crabbe, Golye. I said the Slytherin secret chat room not the main one.

C has left the chat room

G has left the chat room

Slytherin-hottie has left the chat room

Scarface: You guys what to go?

Book-worm: What ever.

Scarface has left the chat room

Book-worm has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: fine…..dont ask me then……..DONT LEAVE WITHOUT ME!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Is anyone here…..

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: Don't tell me. You're a tree.

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark: No! Don't say the word!

Trees,are,friendly,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: What's the word? Hey, is anyone else here?

Toad.on.the.road: There isn't anyone here, is there…..

Toad.on.the.road: Well, I guess im talking to myself again….

Toad.on.the.road: Oh well………..

Toad.on.the.road has left the chat room

Ok, Were sorry that this took so long but with school starting and me, Willowlegs have all acidemic (SP?) corses this semseter, its not fun with homework. But, we hope to get the next one out soon!


	8. Fish, Ninjas and other Sirius Stuff

Fish, Ninjas and Other Sirius stuff

Disclaimer: ………. Ok, time for something new!!!! Yay for newness! Instead of me, C.G. saying this, we brought in a guest who is…….Duh duh duh!!!! HARRY POTTER!!! Ok, so now that he's here I will pass the microphone to him

(She did one story so I have to include K.L.) (Z.L. and K.L. are NOT sisters; they don't even know each other….).

Harry: C.G., Z.L. and K.L. don't own Harry Potter at all, because if they did I wouldn't have had my little hissy fits in the fifth book!

Nicely said there Harry, or should I call you Scarface? Well, once again this story is typed out, not written out before hand, because I hate that…….. This is hopefully going to be funny because me-C.G. - is allllll alone (like Neville and Ron!) Well, I hope you like it and……HAVE FUN!!!!

Scarface has entered the chat room

Scarface: I wonder why I'm on right now….. Hermione said she couldn't come on and Ron is sick……

Scarface: It was this feeling that I should come on……

Dead, but still living the life has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hey look! Someone new to talk to… I think…I hope…

Dead, but still living the life: You're right Harry, except for the new part… You've talked to me before…in life…….well…for me anyways…

Scarface: Hmm, who are you? I'm done with guessing.

Dead, but still living the life: It's me, Sirius.

Scarface: Ok, but who are you?

Dead, but still living the life: Don't tell me Neville paid you to say that.

Scarface: No….. But who are you?

Dead, but still living the life: I already told you, I'm Sirius.

Scarface: Like, Sirius Sirius?

Dead, but still living the life: Yes, that's what I was trying to tell you.

Scarface: Ohhh……… Sirius?

Dead, but still living the life: …..Yes

Scarface: I thought you died, how can you be on msn?

Dead, but still living the life: Ask Neville.

Scarface: Ok.

Fred the Fish has entered the chat room

Scarface: Hey, nice name Fred……but I didn't know you liked fish.

Fred the Fish: Who is this…..Fred you speak of?

Scarface: Good one.

Fred the Fish: Good one what?

Dead, but still living the life: You know like a joke……Harry; I don't think that this is the Fred we know…

Fred the Fish: Your right you pathetic humans….. I would never be one of your kind…..

Scarface: Uh….then who are you…Or what…

Fred the Fish: I belong to the great and powerful army of cannibal fish!

Dead, but still living the life: Right…..But, I have a question for you…. How do you stop from eating yourselves?

Fred the Fish: I didn't say we were a big group…….Hm that makes me hungry all of a sudden…

Fred the Fish has left the chat room

Scarface: I glad I'm not a fish…

Dead, but still living the life: Harry, if you wanted to be a fish you would only need one more thing.

Scarface: What would that be, a three second memory span?

Dead, but still living the life: No, all you would need was to look like one.

Scarface: Hey!!...What were we talking about again?

Dead, but still living the life: Nothing…..but that proves my point.

Scarface: Ok, but Sirius….how does it feel to die?

Dead, but still living the life: I just have one thing to say… DON'T GO TOWARDS THE LIGHT!

Scarface: Sure. Whatever you say must be right.

Party-Master-Ninja has entered the chat room

Eye of the dragon has entered the chat room

Party-Master- Ninja: I'm a ninja, it's my birthday……..I'm a ninja, it's my birthday.

Eye of the dragon: Don't exploit the ninja.

Party-Master- Ninja: Yah, yah…..But I'll still go to parties because we graduated from Ninja Tech.

Eye of the dragon: Seriously, don't exploit the ninja.

Party-Master- Ninja: But I'll be at parties and all clinging on the roof and the people will be like "Did you hear anything Tad?" and they will be like "No" and they'll look up and see me and say "Hey!! What the…..a ninja? Hey! It's a party!!" and ill be like "Just throw the cake up here please."

Eye of the dragon: There are a few things you have to do still….. Defense.

Party-Master- Ninja: Right.

Eye of the dragon: Strategy.

Party-Master- Ninja: Right again.

Eye of the dragon: Eye of the dragon.

Party-Master- Ninja: Ohhohhohooh

Dead, but still living the life: Uh, that's great with all your….ninja party stuff…..right…

Eye of the dragon: What! This isn't the Ninja Tech. chat room?

Scarface: Nope! This is the Hogwarts chat room!

Party-Master- Ninja: Man! That's the third one we've tried! Bye for now ninja man!

Party-Master- Ninja has left the chat room

Eye of the dragon: The party waits!

Eye of the dragon has left the chat room

Scarface: I want to be a ninja…..

Dead, but still living the life: No you don't Harry.

Scarface: How do you know?

Dead, but still living the life: Because in three more seconds you'll forget about them.

Scarface: No I wo……..What was I saying?

Dead, but still living the life: Nothing…Again.

Scarface: Ok, so far we've talked to a cannibalistic fish and to crazy ninjas…..who else are we going to talk to today?

Dead, but still living the life: Hey! You remembered!

Scarface: Remembered what?

Dead, but still living the life: …

Scarface: Any who….who will we talk to now?

Dead, but still living the life: Hey! I know who you would love to talk to! How about your mom and dad?

Scarface: I can talk to them?!?!?

Dead, but still living the life: Yes, I go and get them.

Dead, but still living the life has left the chat room

Scarface: How can he do that?

Scarface: Hey look!

Scarface: It's a bunny!!

Scarface: NO! Don't do that!! OW!! Bad bunny!!!

L has entered the chat room

Scarface: Oh look, another person to talk to!

L: It's me Harry, your mom.

Scarface: ………Really?

L: Really.

Scarface: I've missed you so much!

L has left the chat room

Scarface: Hey! I wasn't done talking to you yet!

Dead, but still living the life has entered the chat room

Scarface: Sirius, do you know were my mom went?

Dead, but still living the life: I fooled you…didn't I?

Scarface: WHAT?!?!? That wasn't my mom? It was you?!?!?!?!?

Dead, but still living the life: Yep, I convinced you pretty quickly.

Scarface: THAT'S NOT FAIR!!!!

Scarface has left the chat room

Dead, but still living the life: …But they were going to come on soon…

Book-worm has entered the chat room

Book-worm: What did you say to him to make him this sad?!!? And who are you? He said something about he was talking to Sirius……… and that he was talking to his mom, that wasn't his mom…

Dead, but still living the life: Uh…

Dead, but still living the life has left the chat room

Book-worm: Hmm, interesting name…..Maybe Harry was right…for once…

Book-worm has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.road has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.road: My spidy senses told me that someone would be on.

Toad.on.the.road: …Is anyone on?

Toad.on.the.road: Maybe a have snail senses…I get on after everyone leaves… I'm an idiot… talking to myself…again

Toad.on.the.road has left the chat room


	9. The Harry Caveman

The Harry Caveman

Disclamer:  We don't own Harry Potter….if we did, we would have to kill ourselves. We also don't own Legolas but we do own Legoland. And that makes us very happy.

We don't know why it's called the Harry Caveman because its not really about him….. But you have to admit it sure sounds cool and is true. And because Harry is a Caveman…and cavemen are hairy…….hmm……thought provoking…… (POOR L!!!!! tear)

Scarface has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: hi

Scarface: me hungry

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: hermione isnt here you dont need to bug her by being grammatically incorrect.

Scarface: me want meat

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: ya i hear ya…….

Bookworm has entered the chat room

Scarface: me caveman

Bookworm: Oh!! Uh….Harry, what are you doing here?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: why…..whats wrong with harry?

Bookworm: Oh!! Nothing…nothing at all……

Scarface: me no want see you

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: why is he talking like a caveman……

Bookworm: oh…..no reason…

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar has entered the chat room

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: me cavewoman

Scarface: me caveman

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: we make tribe

Scarface: tribe we make

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: together

Scarface: argh

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: ginny too……

Bookworm: Um…well, I am trying to make a potion that will make someone act like the other gender…so I put some in there pumpkin juice but it didn't really work….obviously. It is just temporary….I hope.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: …….

Bookworm: Trial and Error!

And they thought we just liked explosions has entered the chat room

Pranksters gone wild has entered the chat room

Pranksters gone wild: tweet tweet

And they thought we just liked explosions: MEOW

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: what's like…..up with them?

Bookworm: )

Bookworm: It was another of my concoctions.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Like….Where did you get your shoes Hermione?

Bookworm: Um….What shoes….?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: You know…The ones at the end of your bed.

Bookworm: How did you get to my room? Guys aren't aloud up there.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: I don't know…..

Bookworm: )

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Like, what?

Bookworm: Nothing…

Pranksters gone wild: TWEET!!!!!!!

And they thought we just liked explosions: MEOW!!!!!!!

Bookworm: Fred! Stop chasing George!

Dead, but still living the life has entered the chat room

Dead, but still living the life: Bonjour!

Bookworm: Oh no….

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Oh, it's like… Another person?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: But, he's dead…How did you give him a potion when he's like…..dead?

Bookworm: Very carefully.

Legoland has entered the chat room

Dead, but still living the life: Bonjour! Comment t'appelle tu?

Legoland: I'm sorry, I don't know gibberish. I only know English and Legolandish.

Bookworm: What is ….Legolandish?

Legoland: The language of my native peoples.

Scarface: what is name?

Bookworm: Harry, you are still here?

Scarface: Me like……cavewoman

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Eww…like…that's my sis

Legoland: Um… Well, my name is Legolas.

Legoland: But where is Frodo? I thought this was Lord of the Rings chat room?

Bookworm: Uh…..no

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Like just no

Dead, but still living the life: Non.

Pranksters gone wild: TWEET!!!!!!!

And they thought we just liked explosions: MEOW!!!!!!!

Bookworm: No!! Don't eat him!! He's your brother!!

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Like…..mom will be so angry at you two.

Legoland: You guys are too weird for me, I'm going to go and hang out with Gandalf.

Legoland has left the chat room

Scarface: fat cat……meat…

Bookworm: No!! Crookshanks!!!

Scarface has left the chat room

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar: were caveman….?

I-am-woman-hear-me-roar has left the chat room

Trees,are,frienldy,don't,bite,the,bark has entered the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: What are you? Like…are you a tree?

Trees,are,frienldy,don't,bite,the,bark: Woof

Bookworm: Darn, his didn't work either.

Pranksters gone wild: TWEET!!!!!!!

And they thought we just liked explosions: MEOW!!!!!!!

Trees,are,frienldy,don't,bite,the,bark: WOOF!!!!!

Bookworm: Stop fighting you three!!

Pranksters gone wild has left the chat room

And they thought we just liked explosions has left the chat room

Trees,are,frienldy,don't,bite,the,bark has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Hermione…..Like why am I the only one that hasn't changed?

Bookworm: )

Bookworm: Well, do you remember the pumpkin juice you had this morning?

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Yes, it had a delightful hint of orange zest.

Bookworm: Well, yours was the one that actually worked.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Like, what do you mean?

Bookworm: The thing that I was trying to do was make someone act like the other gender.

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: What do you like…mean?

Bookworm: IT MEANS YOUR ACTING LIKE A GIRL!!!

Bookworm has left the chat room

Aracniphobic-Red-Head: Hmm, I've always wondered what it would be like to be a girl……there's too much punctuation…and capitals…..

Aracniphobic-Red-Head has left the chat room

Toad.on.the.Road has entered the chat room

Toad.on.the.Road: ribbit?

Toad.on.the.Road: ribbit?

Toad.on.the.Road: RIBBIT!!!!

Toad.on.the.Road: ribbit………

Toad.on.the.Road has left the chat room


	10. C and G Conversation

C and G Conversation

**C and G Conversation**

**Disclaimer: We do... do... do... not own HP.**

**So, this will be a conversation with Crabbe and Goyle. (scattered applause, then silence, quickly followed by a cricket chirping)... Alrighty then! Have fun!**

C has entered the chat room.

G has entered the chat room.

C: hiii

G: hiii

C: ...

G: ...

C: bye

G: bye

C has left the chat room.

G has left the chat room.

**This has been a conversation with Crabbe and Goyle, brought to you by whitetyger123 and schoolgirl-cheesesculpture.**


End file.
